Discovery Part 1

By Darth Lotean

     I’m Nadia On’esti and I’m the luckiest squirrel in the world. In the past I would never dream of saying something like that. My life was miserable, no miserable would be a ‘light’ way to describe what I felt everyday. You see, I’m a twenty nine year old female half sex… That’s just another cute little word for ‘hermaphrodite’, a freak of nature, something that statistically should have never happened but it did. My whole life has been about hiding my little ‘condition’ from prying eyes, just being a normal girl and living a normal life. I thought I found that when I met my first love. She was just like me, hiding just like I was. I thought that we could be free together since we both knew what we were but most things never work out the way you want them to…
     It all started one warm night in the city. I left our loft because my love was being bitchy for absolutely no reason at all except the fact that she was doing something ‘corporate’ or some such. My love worked for Vi’al industries, as a financial analyst she was ‘fine’ outside of the office but when she was starring at numbers on the computer screen she acted like she was some kind of priest, going over holy scripture. That was the thing; she never paid me any attention for any reason. It was like she was hollow inside or something. When she said I love you it was more like she ‘had to’ and not that she actually loved me at all. When we hugged or kissed there was barely any emotion at all. Some would say she was just boring but… At some point you’ll have to show someone you had some kind of feelings instead of just ‘eating’, ‘sleeping’ and ‘working’.
     I’d add fucking but that would imply she had some sort of feelings outside her basic needs and she doesn’t. No. That was too harsh but that’s what I thought at the time of my little walk. I was mad. I tried my hardest to tell her I loved her and she was treating me like dirt for it. I wanted to divorce her and match her up with something that wouldn’t need love, or emotion. Like a computer or a calculator. I didn’t want to do the second part, and divorcing her? Where would I go? What would I do? I had a master’s degree in architectural design, an associates in computer drafting, and an associates in some thing complex and pretentious that boiled down to ‘home design’ and I was usually told I was pretty enough to be a model or something but with all the money I could make as an architect, or a successful model my love was bringing in three times as much working for that bastard corporation.
     And there was the fact that Caluah’s population is shrinking, that means not as many new homes and buildings are needed. That means that the city didn’t need as many designers and architects as it used to. That would leave a modeling career but I was far too old to start doing sexy poses on the cover of vouge besides I was smarter than that. I had more dignity and pride. Plus there was my little secret to consider… I thought about all these things on my walk putting my hands in my jean pockets.
     I found a small hunting knife inside, more like I almost stabbed myself with it. Then I remembered one odd idea I had. I would go out one day, look for a male and rape him. It was a silly idea I know but keep in mind I was a bit crazy and desperate for some kind of attention. Even if it was ‘forced’ from someone the plan was from the scene of the crime go back to my love and let her smell me a bit so she would have to say ‘something’. She’d have to get angry or something. Or at least ask how my day was. Like I said it was a stupid, desperate idea and tonight I thought it was a stupid and desperate enough idea to actually work. I didn’t think about the aftermath of something like this just how good it would feel to have ‘her’ finally notice me. She’d ‘have’ to pay attention, and then she’d have to listen and then she would finally change.
     At least that was the plan. I looked at the knife for a moment and then put it away. As I walked the alleyway adjoining our home I took deep breaths trying to calm myself down. Maybe she just didn’t know I considered as my journey continued. The alleyway was reasonably clean; there weren’t any burning barrels or graffiti on the walls. This was Residential district A though. Everything was clean here. Everything was supposed to be nice. I expanded on my first thought maybe my love just didn’t know that not talking to me, or snapping at me like that was ‘wrong’, but why do I have to suffer for something she doesn’t know? Why doesn’t she pay me any attention? It wasn’t like this before when she was an up and coming intern. She was happy, talkative, and vibrant; she even went to parties, in fact we met at a rave.
     My mind traveled back in time, six years back, back when we first met. We looked so silly in our baggy jeans, fishnet clothes and covered in pink glow sticks. It was love at first sight. Her white fur, black hair and ruby eyes were so captivating, so alive, and above all so mysterious. What happened to her? What happened to the wolf that I wanted to know so much about? A chill ran through the air. Why didn’t I take the car? Because they keys were in my lovie’s office, that’s why. It was getting colder and it was harder to think when you were freezing. Maybe I’d try to stay at one of our neighbor's tonight. Maybe Paula under us, she seems like a good enough fur to help someone out that needs it. It’s not like I needed someone to put up with me for a month or two. Even though that might have been the case if my luck hadn’t changed in an instant.
     When I turned around to go home I saw the most beautiful rabbit I’ve ever seen walking past me. He was an angel; he had white fur with black gloves and socks and a patch around his right eye. He was slender, not very tall; lithe would be a good way to describe his build and it came complete with the cutest deep blue eyes, and long gray hair. He gave me a nod as he passed, brushing some of his shining hair out of his eyes. I found myself starring at his ass long after he passed me. This angel was going to the loft, at least that’s what it looked like. You can’t deny that there is a god and he does have a sense of humor when someone’s little dream of rape and revenge is not only unpunished, but blessed, copiously blessed at that. I tried to crouch and stay quiet. Maybe sneak up behind him but I only succeeded in being even louder than I was standing up.
     It didn’t matter; before he could turn around I was on top of him. Pushing him into the alley wall and then using my body to pin him there. “Alright, listen up. I’ve got a knife right here…” I groaned trying to fish it out of my pocket I was shaking like a leaf. So I poked myself with the blade. Then the strangest thing happened, he backed into my crotch grinding against me but not to get me away from him, just to get me closer “Calm down… Calm down. Jeez it’s not like your asking me to marry you or something.” He chirred; his rear continued to search my crotch, the lump in the middle slowly turning into a tent “So what do we have here? Strap on perhaps? No... Strap on’s don’t get… Oh. Oh my. Is it real?” he squeaked leaning his head back his blue eyes looking into mine. “Y… Yea… Yea it is… Please don’t be mad… I… I just…” he gave me a lick under the chin.
     “Shhhhh… Shhhhh… It’s okay believe me I’ve done this more than you think.” I felt his hands go towards the knife; instead of knocking it out of my hand he lifted my wrist pushing the weapon to his throat. “This is your first time isn’t it? Oh then you probably don’t know about Hunta’s do you?” He said pressing his still clothed rear against me. “N…No… No I don’t…” this little rabbit had me wrapped around his little finger at that point. He could have asked if the sky was hot pink and I would have just stupidly agreed. Damn testosterone. “Okay. I’ll tell you all about it afterwards. So, I’m so helpless against you, you’re the strongest thing on the planet right now...” he said pretending to squirm and fight my ‘iron grip’, he slipped his leather pants down around his ankles, his other hand reaching between his rear.
     When he unzipped me he found the answer to his question when he pushed my modest pride between his rump cheeks. “Oh my god it is real! There’s one more test though…” he gently guided my rod to his puckered star, pushing the head past his fleshy gate. It was clear what he wanted and I had no intention of not giving it to him. I pushed forward into the strangely soft depths of his tail hole and never stopped until my hips touched his. We were like feral animals, thrusting, grunting, and moaning. To say he was a good lay, would be an understatement. It was like sleeping with an angel. When we were finally done and he was clothed again my angel slipped a thin laminated card in my jean pocket.
     “If you wanna see me, come at seven o’clock tomorrow night. That’s when I –he, he- get off…” he kissed me on the chin and started towards his destination again. Zipping up my pants I looked at the card #Yuiriel’s basement. Come for the drinks, stay for the other things ;)# It also had directions to this ‘basement’ but there was one thing I totally forgot in all this “Thank you… What’s your name?” I yelled out but looking down the alley my angel had disappeared. I decided that since it had to be way after eight o'clock at night I’d have to find out in the morning. Regardless if my mate didn’t throw me out after sniffing me a bit. I left the alley, I forgot why I was angry and it was getting even colder so I came back home.
     Our loft was filled with ‘nice’ things. The walls were painted with some, ‘designer’ style paint that changed gradually changed color so you could walk home to new colored walls every three months. The idea was make it look like you were walking into a different house every so often. I thought it was just weird looking, and you couldn’t really match anything like ‘furniture’ to the walls because the perfect color for the perfect chair wouldn’t be there by the time you got said chair into the perfect position. But my mate liked it so it stayed. I walked in to silver walls that were slowly transforming into a deep magenta making the whole thing look like we stopped painting over the deep red walls halfway through.
     The rest of the house was filled with designer brand things. Paintings commissioned by the cities greatest artists, sculptures built from scratch, designer tables, sinks, refrigerators, even the carpet underneath my feet was some pretentious designer brand. Everything about my mate was ‘designer’ or ‘pretentious’ and had to scream ‘wealth’ or my love wouldn’t put up with it for a second. Personally I didn’t care. All I wanted was to be with her no matter how rich we were. “Sweetie…! I’m back!” I yelled my love had left the lights in the living room on but I knew it was just because she forgot to turn them off…
     “Hello?” I asked making my way to where my love set up her home office. It was then that I realized I still had the knife in my hand, bloody from when I poked myself. The slender white wolf was asleep at the keyboard, and the computer had turned itself off, like I had programmed it to. I knew she had a habit of working until she dropped, literally. I laid the knife on the computer desk getting a better look at my love. She always looked so uncomfortable curled up around the computer, so I did what I always did. I carefully loaded her into my arms, took her shoes off, and carried her to the bedroom.
     Our bedroom was filled with more art and custom built sculptures, only the room was painted magenta, real magenta, instead of the color changing crap that we had in the living room. We had the largest size bed that the manufacturer could make; it took up almost a good quarter of the room, the mattress that filled it adapted to whoever laid on it. It was some sort of fancy living material, all of this was topped off with silk covered pillows, silk sheets, and imitation mink fur comforters all custom made to fit the bed. We also had a walk in closet filled with rows of clothes. Some we never got the chance to actually wear. I tucked her under our silk sheets and thought it might be a good idea to patch myself up.
     I went to the bathroom, the whole room was made of marble, we had a marble bathtub slash hot tub slash shower, a marble medicine cabinet built into the wall, a marble sink also built in and a built in marble toilet. I washed and bandaged where I cut myself and took a look in the cabinet mirror .Maybe it was ‘me’ that was changing. I would have never thought of doing something like this in college, or in basic ed. I looked in the mirror. Trying to see where exactly I was changing but the same, five foot seven inch, slim but muscular, red furred, green eyed, gray haired, busy tailed, squirrel stared back at me. After patching myself up I turned the living room lights off and went to bed. The sheer size of our bed made it easy to keep my distance from the snoring wolfess next to me.
     I couldn’t sleep. How could I? I was trying to make sense of the fact that I just cheated on someone I loved so dearly and the one I cheated with must have been an angel. Wait, he interrupted my plan, he ‘wanted’ it to happen. So technically it wasn’t ‘all’ my idea right? I laid there for hours until I finally just couldn’t keep my eyes open. The loud beep or screech of one of the living room clocks told me it was time for my love to start getting ready for work. When I opened my eyes my love was sniffing the air around me “Hey. What do you have on? It smells kind of nice…” she yawned, scratched her sides throwing off the covers. I didn’t answer I just pretended I was too tired and going back to sleep. “Fine… Be like that. I wasn’t the one who made that stupid comment yesterday.” She continued in a condescending ‘holier than thou’ tone of voice.
     “It wasn’t a big deal… You didn’t have to be such a bitch about it. It’s not like I actually meant something by it.” I spat back “Whatever. I’ll see you tonight? After you pick up that cologne or whatever it is you’re wearing…” I rolled my eyes “Yea. Sure. I’ll get right on it…” I couldn’t believe she was so dense didn’t know the good smell she smelled was from another man or she just didn’t care. I was tired to ‘explain’ what it was and I doubt it would have mattered anyways so I just laid there until she left. I couldn’t stop thinking about last night, and ‘him’ how he felt against me, his lips, his hair, his eyes. Then I pulled out the rabbit’s card, and gave a soft sigh. It was ten in the morning and I had to wait until seven at night. I couldn’t stop thinking about him and his ocean blue eyes. Two deep wells you could get lost in forever…
     Despite my education my job description was simple, take care of myself and be a housewife, in my case that boiled down to ‘maid supervisor’. We had three maids come in every three days to clean our ‘non messes’ most made by me since I was the only one who sat around the house all day. There was truly nothing to do, but watch bad soap opera’s and eat snack food all day. Not that I did any of that though. Well okay. I do watch ‘drama of the world’ but I don’t have any snacks, none of them are made by ‘Giovanni’ or ‘Cordon’ or some pretentious corporation. And I don’t really ‘need’ snacks; my love is one hell of a cook. Looking back it was one of the only perks of our relationship back then actually looking back there were a lot of ‘good’ things about ‘us’ I missed. Maybe I could have done more to make ‘us’ work better too.
     I didn’t know, and I didn’t know when six thirty rolled around. All I knew then was I had to get out of the loft to meet my angel, and maybe, just maybe tell him everything. That I was married and couldn’t be doing this basic ed crap. Sneaking around, meeting in secret places, and trying to come up with bullshit explanations for why I was away. Yea that’s what I was gonna do. No more sex, just a one night stand. He has to know that. I left the loft and followed the white rabbit just to tell him he wasn’t ‘all that’…